Today I read about a research study in forgiveness. Researchers from the University of Miami studied the effects of journaling…Today’s Challenge: Play The Optimism Game!

President, The American Institute of Stress Clinical Professor of Medicine and Psychiatry, New York Medical College Honorary Vice-President, International Stress Management …American Institute of Stress is dedicated to advancing understanding …

Anxiety Panic Attack & Agoraphobia–Impact of Fight/flight by Richard Kuhns

My first visit with the client, Jane, with whom I developed this technique that demonstrated 80% success rate, left my office with a full blown anxiety attack–not a good start. I thought I’d never see her again and hoped I wouldn’t hear from her attorney in the form of a law suit. Actually as apologetic and embarrassed as she was, a law suit was a very remote possibility. But I wonder how many clients in similar situations might not be considering law suits against clinicians using inward focusing techniques that can bring on panic attacks. Then again, their personality is not that of a trouble maker and as long as they continue suffering from anxiety, they would never allow themselves to be in a court room for fear of having an anxiety attack and having to run away or lose control.

Inward focus techniques are generally what most professionals use–it’s having the client focus on relaxing one’s breadth, muscles, thoughts… to learn relaxation. However, in reality, it’s these type of techniques that contribute to anxiety attacks.

Within a few days, Jane did call again. She was too fearful to come to the office—she blamed her anxiety attack on my small 12’X12” treatment room which is more than three times the size of most treatment rooms. She asked if I’d consider in-home sessions. Reluctantly I agreed.

A few days later I arrived at her home with an Galvanic Response (GSR) biofeedback instrument in hand. I didn’t want a repeat of our first meeting so I avoided using any relaxation exercises that used inward focus. I took more time to get to know Jane. I got the feeling that she could talk for hours about her symptoms, but I wanted to know more about what stressors led to the beginning of the anxiety attacks. According to the Homes-Rahe Stress Scale, I’d be looking for some rather significant life changes six months to a year before the onset of symptoms.

Yes, her panic and anxiety started about six months after she and her family moved back to NJ from the Florida Keys. “Ah ha,” I thought to my self although I didn’t know what to do with this information at the moment. I learned that she was unhappy living in Florida. She had no close friends and she missed the camaraderie of her sisters and mother back in NJ.

It was so much of a problem that eventually she convinced her husband to change jobs and move back to NJ with her teen age son in expectation of life being the way it used to be. But much to her disappointment, her sisters were married with other interests and the relationship with her mother was different—the camaraderie she remembered was gone. The result was that she was no happier in NJ with her family than she was in the Florida Keys.

To me it seem obvious that she’d want to run away from this whole disappointing mess. How could she explain to her husband the move was for naught? And her teen age son was getting into some trouble with drugs—another disappointment for which she was unprepared.

I explained my take on her plight by asking her, “OK, you were unhappy in Florida, convinced your husband to uproot the family, change jobs, and move back to NJ so you’d be happy with your family only to find that your relationships with your sisters and mother has changed and that your son was getting into trouble. Wouldn’t you just like to run away from this whole embarrassing mess?” She acknowledged that she’d like to escape the whole entire mess, but it’s not her nature.

I explained that her brain was simply taking action on that desire. I explained the fight/flight reaction to stress—how when we feel threatened the unconscious intelligence gets us ready to fight or run—even a threat to our egos, family status…–and that since she is not a fighter (personality wise), there’s plenty reason to unconsciously want to run away. But being a responsible person, she would never allow her self to run away.

OK, then we talked about diet and how certain foods can trigger anxiety—sweets, refined carbohydrates, caffeinated beverages…

All this was nice, but she still had trouble understanding how she was ever going to gain control of anxiety since it just happens “out of the blue.”

Essentially, this is the first step—educating the conscious mind. I left her home without ever using the biofeedback instrument and focused on the challenge of making a difference in her life—how to shift her from the conditioned response of anxiety.

First it was apparent to me that the panic anxiety label her primary doctor gave her was in the absence of understanding much about her background. She came to a conclusion that she had a problem and no one knew how to cure it—certainly took her mind off her real problems in life—anxiety was an escape.

In summary, personality factors of being highly responsible led Jane to want to escape the seemingly impossible situation in which she placed her family–a move for naught. Add to that hi-sugar eating habits, a suggestion she gave herself re another family member having had anxiety attacks, and the fight/flight wanting her to escape her family status, and voila, she created agoraphobia and anxiety panic attacks. See the resource box for more information on how to overcome panic and anxiety.

Richard Kuhns B.S. Ch. E., NGH certified operated a stress management clinic for 17 years, educator and seminar leader for various corporations, and is the author behind the best selling stress management hypnosis self help cds at http://www.DStressDoc.com and new treatment for anxiety panic attack using wakened hypnosis at http://www.PanicBusters.com
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Whether it’s a fight with your spouse, a disagreement with your mother or an altercation with a friend, conflicts can be a significant source of stress for most people, even…Conflict Resolution Strategies–for Your Health

Stress & Self Esteem, 4: Reaching out for Help

By: Tanja Gardner

THE FINAL STEP

The final step in the model of building self-esteem can be the hardest. Why? Because everything up till now has involved things we could do alone. Reaching out for help, however, means involving other people - which brings with it a whole host of new challenges. Reaching out to someone requires someone you trust to reach out to - not always easy when your self-esteem is low. Not only this, but for those with over-active Inner Critics, it’s easy to tell ourselves it’s selfish to bother other people with our problems - that we should be able to deal with it on our own - that reaching out for help shows weakness (or is only for those far worse off than we are).

So why reach out? Well, as John Donne so wisely observed back in the 16th Century, ‘no man is an island’. However independent we like to see ourselves, none of us are born with all the skills we will ever need. Additionally, other people can provide feedback - offering perspective and helping us to see which thoughts are realistic, and which are totally unfounded. And if that’s not enough, support networks can sometimes prevent problems. The seeds that create low self-esteem find their most fertile ground in people who feel isolated and unable to connect.

OVERCOMING INNER OBJECTIONS

Often, the first step in reaching out is dealing with our own objections. If your immediate reaction is ‘I couldn’t do that’, or ‘That’s all very well, but…’, give yourself a moment to just listen. Start a conversation with the part of you that’s objecting, and ask it why. Treat it just as you would your Inner Critic. Your initial aim is not to argue - it’s just to learn. Once you understand what your internal objections are, th!
 en you can evaluate and argue with them.

We’d suggest that before you start evaluating, you re-read the previous parts of this article series (see links above). In particular, we suggest you remind your inner objector that:

• You can’t give to other people what you don’t already have yourself
• True friends prefer we talk to them, rather than pretending that everything’s fine
• Recognising the resources you need that you don’t currently have, then asking for them, is a sign of good planning, not weakness
• If your objector believes your problem is ‘not yet bad enough to involve someone else’, how bad do things have to get before it *is* OK to get help? And won’t you need even more help when things get to that stage than you do now?

Let’s assume that you’ve spoken with your inner objector, and come to the conclusion that asking for help really does make more sense than trying to go it alone. Where can you go from here?

WHO TO REACH OUT TO

The first, most obvious port of call is among the people you already know. Look at your friends and family. Is there someone you can trust to listen without judging you? Someone you feel comfortable asking for ideas? In an ideal situation, this would be someone who has fairly high self-esteem themselves - someone you can learn from. Although your initial response might be that there’s no-one you can think of, we’d encourage you to look hard before assuming you don’t know anyone - sometimes support can come from the most unlikely places.

If there’s genuinely nobody you feel comfortable trusting in real-life, however, a great alternative is to look for support online. Discussion groups like Yahoo groups, and online journalling communities like Live Journal both have a wide range of communities that exist specifically to share support, encouragement and feedback between members. Most of these allow you to ‘lurk’ for a while before you need to post - something that can help you build up your trust over time. Additionally, many of the self-help sites that offer self-help res
ources (e.g. selfesteem4women.org, uncommon knowledge), also provide discussion forums that allow you to connect with other people with similar problems.

Finally, if neither of these seem like possibilities (or if you’ve tried both and they’re not enough), you may want to consider reaching out to someone who’s trained to help - generally a coach or counsellor. Unlike the above two options this will usually involve some kind of payment, although if you’re still at school / university, or lucky enough to work in a company with an EAP (Employee Assistance Programme), you may have free counselling available. Your local library or Citizen’s Advice Bureau should have suggestions for counsellors / coaches, or you could try online coaching.

It’s important to remember that different professionals will have different approaches to helping you work on your self-esteem, and not every approach works for everyone. It’s OK if the first person you speak to doesn’t feel quite right for you - just keep looking until you find someone you feel comfortable with. Bear in mind that if you’re paying someone your hard-earned money, you have a right to feel happy with whatever you’re getting in return.

THE FINAL WORD

Whatever you do, the most important thing for you to take from this article is that you don’t need to do it alone! And remember too that, although we’ve explored the three steps to building self-esteem (i.e. Rebutting your inner critic, Nurturing yourself, and Reaching out for help) in order, there’s no reason that you can’t work on them in a different order (or all at the same time!)

This brings us to the end of our four-part article series on Stress and Self-esteem. If you have any feedback, suggestions, questions or comments about the advice or resources (or you’d like to suggest any websites, groups or products), please contact us on optimumlife@xtra.co.nz. We’ll have a new article topic in the next issue - until then, may every day bring you closer to your Optimum Life.

Author Bio

2005 Tanja Gardner, Optimum Life Ltd. You can reprint this article in its entirety, as long as you include this resource box. Optimum Life Ltd (optimumlife.co.nz) is dedicated to providing balanced fitness and stress management services that help clients all over the world achieve their optimum lives. For more information on how we can help you move closer to living your optimum life, please check out our website. For a copy of our free Stress Audit Questionnaire, please send an e-mail to optimumlife@xtra.co.nz with ‘Stress Audit Questionnaire’ in the subject header.

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These Is The Significance of Effective Stress Management

25th July 2008

Author: Muna wa Wanjiru

Effective stress management is very significant because it ensures that you are able to go on with your life and get to enjoy every minute of it. You cannot have effective stress management if you are not aware of all the aspects that come to play to ensure stress levels are controlled. Stress is that feeling of being cornered where you are not willing to look at any possibility of positivity. It is pretty hard to look for something positive in a grave situation but, even at such a time, effective management will seek to bring out the good and discard the negative. Stress is commonly caused by stressors which might be external or form the inside. Human beings are constantly dealing with stress and this means that stressors are in plenty.

Stress has the ability to change your life negatively if only you allow it. We are therefore not helpless because we can engage management tips that will help us overcome. Firstly, you must know what stress is and how it shows itself in our lives. In this modern age, you are probably too busy to even consider whether you might need to deal with stress in your life therefore, everyone needs to take the following caution to heart. Do not think that you are immune and before stress strikes, you have to have some tools or weapons which you will use to fight it. If you are constantly feeling inadequate as if you are missing something you cannot get and it is frustrating, make a point of dealing with those emotions effectively.

It is okay for you to have such feelings once in a while then they go away after you form a defense mechanism against them but, if you feel like this everyday, you are doing a disservice to your body. It is a sign of stress and it is usually passed on to the people around you who might fear you because of your temper and lack of patience. Stress will also be known when you are handling people. You might display insecurity and also seem to be withdrawn from people. This are just a few signs of stress and they do not reflect how everyone acts and this is because the effects of stress are very individual, you have to know the main signs so that you can have a general overview.

Effective stress management will require you to seek the help of a professional who has had some experience in the field. They might prescribe all sorts of remedies like relaxing or even watching some comedies that will enable you laugh and appreciate life again. You will be advised on how to handle stress. Many women have been stressed over men who they are in relationships with. This goes to show that many people are facing different stressors and it will be more than helpful to have effective management so that they do not have worse consequences which may come from severe stress in their daily lives.

Peter Gitundu is a Web Administrator and Has Been Researching and Reporting on Stress for Years. For More Information on Stress Management, Visit His Site at STRESS MANAGEMENT You Can Also Post Your Views About Stress Management On My Blog Here STRESS MANAGEMENT

These Is What Effective Stress Management Entails

25th July 2008

Author: Muna wa Wanjiru

Home stress and office stress have a meeting point everyday and if you suffer from both, you might have to deal with double trouble. We are the same people who are going to the office after a night of argument at home and there is therefore need for effective stress management. One example of office stress is when a co worker has affected your productivity and you have to take the blame and the shame. It is not easy handling the two and you need professional help if the condition becomes worse. Like in all other kinds of stress, you need to be aware of the fact that you need help. Being stubborn will not do the job. You must know the signs that inform you of looming stress.

The first one is a feeling of discouragement every time your are preparing to go to work and to come home from work. The zeal, enthusiasm or excitement that had been there, suddenly vanishes and you find yourself dragging yourself to and from work. The home is supposed to a be an island for escape and a place where positivity is center stage and when this is not so, you might not even have time to deal with your stress. Some people start to develop headaches or migraines which might see them resting in the bed with no plans to find out the root cause.

The situation can be made worse when there are little children constantly bothering you. When you realize there is a problem, you may not put your finger on stressor right away and visiting a doctor may be in order. Some questions about your past and behavior will be tabled forth and then you can get a diagnosis which will confirm stress at work and at home. The major remedy for the stress will be to take it easy and get your mind freed from all worries and they might get some medication to control the migraines. You are concerned about effective stress management and to deal with it, you will have to do a few things. The first thing is to establish what the stressor was exactly so that you can avoid and engage other questions in the future.

Therefore, this means that you have to come with a better way to deal with your family issues and work situation. People who have been seen to overcome this kind of stress have formed stress coping mechanisms which ensure that even if the stressors continue, your mind is somewhat immune to the effects of the stress. This does not mean that you become numb to your problems but, it simply means that you avoid the ones you cannot handle, accept the ones you can and adapt to whatever situation that you may find yourself in. These are some of the keys to effective stress management at home or at the work place. You must also consider how stress affects you personally and know what to do when the effects of stress starts to show. Know whether the kind of stress you might be having is harmful or helpful to you. Remember, stress can be managed effectively

Peter Gitundu is a Web Administrator and Has Been Researching and Reporting on Stress for Years. For More Information on Stress Management, Visit His Site at STRESS MANAGEMENT You Can Also Post Your Views About Stress Management On My Blog Here STRESS MANAGEMENT

Stress management: Do You Know How To Relax?

09th July 2008

Author: Paul

It seems like everyone is trying to learn how to deal with stress. From work hassles, to family problems, to money issues, people’s lives are filled with potential stressors.

One very good way to handle stress is relaxing. Taking just 10 or 15 minute break away from your hectic life can do your mind and body a world of good.

But, surprisingly, many people don’t seem to know how to relax themselves effectively. They know how to take a short break away from the stresses of work, or running after hyperactive kids. But they don’t know how to use that break to give them the most benefits.

So, how do you relax the right way? Here are some tips.

Let Go of the Tension

If you have been on your feet all day, sitting down for five or ten minutes can be a huge relief. But if you are sitting in your chair as stiff as a board, and already thinking about having to go back to work in a little bit, you aren’t really relaxing.

When you sit down to take your break, forget about the work you will have to get back to once the break is over. Make a conscious effort to let go of the tension. Put your feet up, if you can. Relax those stiff muscles. You can even slouch in your seat if you want to.

A good way to relieve stress is by relaxing your body.

Don’t Think

Many people use their breaks to think. They think about all of the things they have to do after work, or once the kids are off to school. Or they think about how they will deal with the problem that came up before their break.

Typically, thinking about things like work-related problems or your busy schedule aren’t very relaxing.

During your break, try occupying your mind with something that won’t add to your stress. Read a romance novel or an entertainment magazine. Or put some time into playing with a stress relief toy.

Rethink Those Errands

The purpose of a break is to give you some time to relax and reenergize, so you can face the rest of the day with renewed energy and pep. However, if you spend your breaks running errands, you aren’t giving yourself time to relax or reenergize.

So, before you spend your break running errands, reconsider. Are these things you absolutely have to do during your break, or can you do them at another time?

Learning how to deal with stress is critical. But things can get so hectic, some people feel almost guilty for taking a moment to relax. However, by doing so, you will actually make yourself better able to deal with the stresses of daily life.

——

I, Paul Phillips am a health writer researcher. I graduated in ‘Biological Sciences’ which includes biochemistry, physiology and nutrition. I have worked in various related research and development labs.
I am always willing to give advice and help people in my field. For more information please try the link: http://www.HealthNewsLive.net

Stress Management Courses For Immediate Relief
By Scott Goodman

When stress has become seriously damaging to your life, such as making you irritable all the time, drained of energy, and unmotivated, then it’s time to take serious measures to counter that stress. The faster that you get help for dealing with your stress, the better, and there are a number of classes in your area alone that will help you achieve a stress free life within a few months at most. While stress management courses might take a few months to fully remove stress from your life, they can provide a great level of immediate relief to get you back on track right away.

Not Free, But Immediate Results

Stress management courses generally aren’t free, but there’s no better way to get one on one relief for your stress immediately. Instructors will teach you exactly how to perform a huge variety of stress management techniques to not only help you remove stress from your life but also cope with it more easily with the help of a variety of stress management games. Simply search the yellow pages in your phone book or do a search online. Also, you can check to see if local organizations such as the YMCA in your area offer stress management courses. While these organizations have member fees, you’ll get access to the courses for free, and you’ll also get access to a variety of other members’ benefits, such as gyms, pools, and inside basketball courts.

When you get to a stress management course, you’ll quickly realize how serene the process will be, aiming to remove every last bit of stress from your life. While you’ll still think that finding the money to pay the bills on time is important, it won’t keep you up at night. All of that hard work that you have to do each day will also seem less troublesome, and even finding a babysitter for the kids in time for the concert tonight won’t bother you. Stress management courses help you to deal with every aspect of stress in your life, from where it comes from to how to deal with it.

As a rule of thumb, stress management courses tend to be much more effective than reading up on how to perform stress relief yourself. Of course, you may still find it useful to pick up a guide or two on how to remove stress from your life, as these guides can complement stress relief classes well. If stress is seriously damaging your relationships, work, and morale, then it’s time to pay the small fee and take the few hours to attend a stress management course.

You can find many more Stress Management Tips and related articles at Symptoms of Stress

For all your Stress Management needs, please visit http://www.wickedstressedout.info

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